The Anti-Social Network



It's time to bring up somewhat lingering issue I have been having about Facebook lately. I have been a member since 2005 and when I would like to say loyally, I won't. At least not as of late. I remember the days when communication was key. Remember those days when people shoved that down your throat? It seems like yesterday. Well, it's because it probably was. People are still preaching that yet, we now have this problem, I have this problem, with the website and not just Facebook, but social media and making it actually less of a social world.

If you think about the good old days, when you had a birthday or wanted to hang out with your friend, ask them how their recent vacation was you would just pick up the phone and call. Now you click on their face,scroll through their page,check their status and go through pictures and "like" comments they have made or pictures they was posted. If you want to get real friendly and social, you "poke" them. I have been trying to get used to the idea of never having a real conversation again on the phone with somebody, but I refuse to let that be reality. I'm trying to have faith in the human race, even though we seem to be turning into our own narcissistic nightmares and most are too caught up being a celebrity they have created in their own mind to understand yet. We spend hundreds of dollars on top of the line phones and we don't really use them anymore. But we will however buy it, practical or not, if it comes with a Facebook app. It doesn't make any sense to me.

Call me old fashion but I liked getting a happy birthday phone call on my birthday. I will even take a text message these days. At least that's more personal. Don't get me wrong, I appreciated the 40 Happy Birthday messages on my page this year, but more then half of them are people I don't talk to and may have never spoke to, and surely do not hang out with. I would be more impressed to know that all 40 of these people actually knew my birthday and didn't need the website to remind them of that, but that is not reality is it.

Facebook is becoming an anti-social network in my opinion. While people may think it's this great entity, and at first it was, it's making people very lazy. I can't tell you how many times I have tried to call a friend to chit chat about what has been going on in their lives the last few months, and I get no answer. I decide to leave a message and cross my fingers I get a call back. Later on, noticing that about 20 minutes after my call to them, they post a comment on Facebook about having a "Sex & the City night with popcorn and wine, yum!" Better, when I call, and leave a message and I get a wall posting saying they were 'sorry they are out and they will call me later' 30 seconds after the fact. I feel like it's allowing people to become more narcissistic and it's easier for you to dodge people. I believe that's more anti social then social. Its becoming increasingly easier to never have to talk to anyone or even hang out with them. You can check their page and within 10 minutes of looking through mobile uploads and status message, you realized your best friend just got married, is pregnant and moving to Idaho to be a forest ranger with her new dog! Whoa! Where was the phone call?

When you become pregnant or engagement it's almost like you haven't told anyone yet till you post it on Facebook. I kind of love the days of being surprised by a birth announcement showing up in the mail or being at a family get together and the happy couple announcing their good news. Now it's all done through this one website. It's like a one stop shop to dump all your feelings, emotions, heartaches,and new purchases. Almost like therapy, but free. My other major problem is the over sharing of individuals who go on a public websites to talk about their marital problems, kidney stones and to my whore, a play by play of a miscarriage. (For the record, I deleted her). Is there anything left private anymore? Is it just me? Maybe I have become too sensitive. Or, maybe I have just outgrown Facebook.

While all of this may have sounded negative, what I have noticed is that while a lot of old friends taking to the new Facebook way as a new, less involved means of communication, I have found old friends who I grew up with and have been so happy to reconnect with and actually chat with them more then the old ones. Go figure. Now, that being said, I have found a positive in the situation but that does not excuse society as a whole, defining ourselves by status and updates. This may sound like I am against all social media, and I want to say I'm not. I am saying, that we need to be more responsible with it and keep the humility alive and not forget how to talk to people face to face, to call someone on their birthday, to tell your closest friends and family your great news before you announce it to your 1,200 closest friends on Facebook. Civility is a super important thing. Make sure you aren't reckless with it. Pay more attention to friends and family and give more face time is all I'm saying. Life is short, don't spend hours of your life away on Facebook, just call your friends.

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